It's not often that I support Boston....

      I find that, as you grow up, you slowly find out that the world can be a very cruel place. There are people out there without good intentions whose sole aim is to cause havoc, destruction, and incite fear into peoples' lives. It is a sick reality that slowly becomes increasingly evident as we age. What happened yesterday in Boston was a terrible act of violence upon what was supposed to be a spectacularly celebrated day for so many people. Two bombs exploding in a crowd of innocent spectators on Patriots day in the 26th mile of a race dedicated that was dedicated to the 26 people who lost their lives in Newtown is absolutely sickening. 

      In the last decade and a half, I watched as planes hit two towers in a city that I consider my second home. I watched waters rush over the 9th ward in New Orleans when the levy broke during Katrina. I looked first hand at some of the destruction caused by Sandy. I watched as news of the shootings in the Aurora, Colorado movie theater, Sandy Hook Elementary, and Virginia Tech scrolled across my news feeds. Every night as you watch the news, it seems as though there is some atrocious act of inhumanity or nature wreaking havoc over our country. It is amazing how much damage so few people can do on our society. What is glossed over, often times, is the rallying that occurs afterwards. 

      On September 11th, 2001, the world watched as the people of New York ran through the streets of the financial district away from the Trade Centers. But, as that was happening, thousands of men and women were running towards the towers trying to get people out. People held vigilant for weeks looking for survivors in the rubble. The nation unified in a strong network of support as people from all across it descended upon the New York and Washington with their services.

      In 2005, the flood waters from Hurricane Katrina wrecked the 9th ward, killing some and displacing thousands. People flooded to the site to give aid and volunteer. To this day, people are still returning to volunteer and raising money to rebuild.

      As one disturbed individual went into an Elementary School and proceeded to harm students, teachers and other faculty barricaded the children in hiding places and used themselves as shields to keep them safe. Then in the aftermath, millions of people rallied their support to the small town offering any assistance that they could.

      Yesterday in Boston, a radical minority caused extreme pain in the heart of a strong city. They left three dead and over a hundred people injured. Scenes of terror were blaring through every American television leaving the nation stunned and terrified. But even in this situation, there were people rising to the occasion. Within seconds of the bomb blast, you see first responders and marathon volunteers running towards the chaos. There is footage of people plowing through the rubble to help those in the direct blast zone. People who had just finished a marathon continued running on to hospitals in an attempt to donate blood to the victims. Boston residents offered up their homes to victims and stranded individuals and came into the streets offering them food and water as comfort. Former Patriot Joe Andruzzi spent hours carrying injured people to safety. 

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of ‘disaster,’ I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world.” -Fred Rogers

      There is evil in this world. There is a lot of evil in this world: some human, some nature. The only thing is the amount of good is in the majority. Regardless of whether it was one person behind what happened yesterday or a hundred people behind it, no matter what it is one a fraction to what good was displayed yesterday. Acts of inhumanity are often times what prompt the biggest acts of humanity. In the wake of adversity, our American citizens always come together in a strong resolve of unity and kindred spirit which is much stronger than any act of terrorism that can be perpetrated against them.

'Til the Day I Die

      My freshman year of college, I was asked by a friend to join her at an information session for one of the over 600 organizations on the campus of The Ohio State University. I had no idea what I was going to; I just went because she didn't want to go alone. I sat in a room with around 20 other people and sat a little shell shocked as Greek letters were being spoken at me. The members in front of me kept mentioning doing a lot of community service and it seemed a lot like things that I enjoyed in high school. Leaving the meeting, I still had no idea what the organization was called, but I was going to join with my friend. Looking back, that decision was one of the most critical moments of my life. That was the moment I started my journey to become a brother of Alpha Phi Omega.

     It was a huge risk for me. I was that shy kid that kind of sat in the background and didn't say anything. This idea of joining a service orientated brotherhood was terrifying. I came in with no preconceived notions. Back then, I wouldn't even be able to tell you what a brotherhood was. After four years, spending exorbitant amounts of time with these crazy people who kept throwing Greek letters at me, I think I can define it.

What is brotherhood?

      I am guilty of using the mantra, "I came for the service, stayed for the friends." From the moment I joined, I felt like I belonged. Brotherhood is that sense of belonging. Brotherhood is my first pledge meeting when the 'bigs' were introducing themselves and a guy stands up and says, "Choose me, you're going to be jealous if you don't because I'm the best big ever," (I bet you will never guess which big I chose). Brotherhood is when you find out that someone shares your favorite restaurant and proceed to go eat there weekly for over two months. Brotherhood is when someone sits in a car with you for 32 hours in the course of a week and is still willing to speak to you afterwards. Brotherhood is when you were at the hospital the entire night and spent the entire day in bed crying and someone comes to check on you at 5 pm because you hadn't been answering texts and phone calls all day, then when they see that you're in a bad place, invite you out to dinner with them. Brotherhood is when you tell someone that you think you might have to quit the fraternity and they tell you, "No matter what you decide to do, you're always welcome here and you're always my little." Brotherhood  is that someone who goes trekking across campus in the middle of finals to give you a hug and play a game of pickup volleyball because you're having a rough week. Brotherhood is when you are sitting in a hospital bed and someone comes and talks to you for five hours straight just to cheer you up. Brotherhood is when someone picks up their phone at 3 am, opens their front door, and rolls over to let you take up half their bed because you got in a fight with your roommate and can't stay in the dorm that night. Brotherhood is when your dad dies and someone comes to meet you outside chapter because they wanted to be the first one to give you a hug and when you walk in there seems to be a never ending reception line of others ready to do the same. Brotherhood is when someone carries you 400 yards up and down flights of steps because you just shattered your knee and then drives you home in the morning to grab crutches. Brotherhood is when you feel like giving up and someone gives you that push to give it one more try.

      Brotherhood happens in those moments where you form this irrevocable bond with someone. Brotherhood happens when you realize that these people are here for you, no matter what you need, and you want more than anything to be the same to them. Brotherhood is a product of common goals being completed by uncommon people. As a brother of Alpha Phi Omega, I know I am a brother for life and I have built unbreakable bonds with some of the most amazing people that I have ever met. I could speak to my brothers every day or go years without a word and the same spirit of brotherhood would remain. We are forever united in common goals and convictions: socially, academically, spiritually diverse and yet at the concurrently the same. That is brotherhood.

What is my Legacy?

      April 7, 2013 will be the one year anniversary of the day I lost one of the most important men in my life. At 11:30 in the morning on the eve of Easter, I got a phone call from my father's boyfriend informing me that I needed to get to the hospital as quickly as I could because my dad was in bad shape. I had spoken to my father only 12 hours before and had to go abruptly because there was someone on the other line. We quickly made plans for him to drive me back up to school the next day because my car was in Syracuse. I never imagined that 3 minutes would be the last time I ever spoke to him.

      I arrived at the hospital at noon because thankfully I had taken my mother to work that day and had her car. I came in and was informed that he was still in the emergency room and that they were going to be admitting him due to a large pulmonary embolism. Thirty minutes later they let me back to his room and as I walked through the door, he started coding. I got pushed back and out towards a window and watched as they started CPR and used the paddles to shock life into him 3 times. As soon as he was stabilized, they whisked him away to the ICU.

      After coding 17 times that day and enduring 2 different surgeries, I was approached as the next of kin. I was informed that there would be a good amount of brain damage and that he probably was not going to come back. They asked for consent to end extraordinary measures. He lasted until around 11:30 PM, just long enough for his mother to see him one last time.

      The hardest thing I have ever had to witness is the heartbreak that my brothers, his brothers, my family had to go through; telling my family that my father was dead was devastating.

      Going through something like that really puts your life in perspective. I have learned so much in the last year as a result of it. People come first. The people in your life are your legacy when you're gone. When you lose someone, you don't look back and remember with reverence the degree they earned. You remember the way that they touched your life. Losing my father made me completely reconsider my life. What would people remember if I died today?

      Well, I can tell you that I didn't like the answer a year ago. A year ago, I would be remembered as the depressed kid who couldn't pull her life together to save it. I was the kid that people honestly expected to see in the ground before graduation. I was scaring my best friends on a continual basis with my depravity and stupid actions. What kind of a legacy is that to leave? Not one that I would be proud of.

      In these last months, I have done my best to improve my legacy. I want to be the friend that you can depend on to always have their life together. I want people to see me, not as someone who is depressed or helpless, but as someone who has confidence in herself. I want my friends and family to know how much I love and appreciate them. I feel like that is something you can't tell people enough, that you love them.

      Almost two years ago, my best friend told me something that I didn't quite understand at the time. He said, 'The world is your oyster.' I feel like I can finally put that into practice. It isn't acceptable to sit idly by and watch the world pass you. For the first time in a very long time, I am in a fantastic place in my life. I have friends whom I love and who love me in return. I have a purpose in life: be the friend that you'd like to have. Leave a legacy that you're proud of.

      It is tragic that what led me to this realization happened. I wish I had realized sooner that I needed to be a better friend. I needed to put the people I love first. Sometimes, it takes losing something in order to realize that nothing in this world is guaranteed and that you need to take advantage while you have the chance. Life is a series of moments that you can never get back and you never know how many you have left. Love is the answer to true happiness and it isn't just the love that you receive. It's the love you give.